MYSTERIOUS MONDAY: Whither the Hit Person by Gary Alexander

by Gary Alexander 

In this age of the fictional vampire and other writerly fads, is the classic hit man/woman/person in mystery fiction getting the hook?

Perhaps, perhaps not.

I’m not suggesting that they’re going the way of the Ivory-billed woodpecker, but their purity is in jeopardy. Hit persons are showing up as protagonists, for crying out loud.

Disappeared's new digital cover!

Whether they’re pathologically bad or are written with some, uh, redeeming qualities, they pretty much do the same thing. They kill somebody and get paid for it. This usually goes on until the end of the novel. Then the hit person is either dispatched by a civic-minded protagonist or retained for the next book in the series, whether he or she is the protagonist or not.

I’m sorry, but that’s just too neat and civilized for my taste.

In Disappeared, Ted Snowe turns the profession on its ear. Ted is an ersatz hit man. The Mafia pays him to “whack out” individuals with whom they have grievances. Ted takes their cash under false pretenses. Instead of giving value for payment received, he prepares new identities for the subjects, throws a net over them, charges them a hefty fee for their lives, and releases them into the wild, thus double-dipping.

Ted is bluffing them. He wouldn’t harm a soul, except opponents with his elbows when he played minor-league basketball in places like Rockford and La Crosse, as boos echoed throughout near-empty gyms.

Gary Alexander

This outrageous violation of business ethics eventually comes to the attention of his clients, who send a real hit man after Ted.

Leonardo (The Asp) Aspromonte loves his work and takes enormous pride in it. He idolizes Albert Anastasia, president and CEO of Murder Incorporated, an organization with an impressive body count. Albert, himself, was whacked out on Friday, October 25, 1957, while reclined in a barber chair at Manhattan’s Park Sheraton for his last shave, allegedly by the Gallo brothers, capable hit men in their own right.

The Asp does catch up to Ted, but he also receives a minor-league elbow to the noggin before he can do what he does. When The Asp awakens, Anastasia is inside his head, serving for the rest of the novel as a consultant.

So there it is, an untidy professional sequence, circular mayhem or the promise thereof. A hit man who isn’t is pursued by a hit man who is, aided by the mother of all hit men, who was ventilated over fifty-five years ago.

Further, Ted Snowe, the phony-baloney assassin, becomes romantically entangled with the ex-wife of one of his non-victims.

And late in Disappeared, yet another person arrives to practice the craft, providing a lollapalooza of an ending.

Details?

That would be telling.

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Gary Alexander's mystery caper, Disappeared, first appeared in hardcover through Five Star Cengage Press, and is now available digitally through Istoria Books. Order here on Amazon.

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Istoria Books's "Mysterious Monday" program features posts about mystery writing, reading, bookselling and more by writers from beyond the Istoria stable. Stop back on Mondays for insightful posts on the mystery genre. Check out Istoria Books's mystery offerings here.


Mysterious Monday posts from the past:

• A President's Day Mystery
  
• Mystery writers' and readers' mystery pet peeves, part deux 
• Mystery writers and readers' mystery pet peeves, part one
• Carola Dunn writes about her experiences with a mysterious bookstore display: Downton Abbey, Barnes & Noble, and Carola Dunn
• JennyMilchman writes about "Putting the MIST in mystery: obscuring facts"

Coming up: Author Joyce Yarrow talks about favorite characters and favorite character types in mystery, and book blogger and reviewer Marlyn Beebe shares her thoughts on what she likes in mysteries
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MYSTERIOUS MONDAY: Pet Peeves in Mysteries, Part Deux

by Libby Sternberg

Last week, we featured comments from mystery writers and readers about their pet peeves in mystery stories. The post was very popular, and even after it was up, I was still receiving "peeves" in my email. So -- drum roll, please! -- here's Part Two of that post, with a few more comments on what gets mystery writers, in particular, riled up when reading or watching stories in their favorite genre. Enjoy....and know that some time in the coming months, I will feature a post on the opposite topic -- what do mystery writers and readers particularly like about mystery stories, and what kinds of storytelling help them look past their peeves and keep turning pages.

Convenient time-eating explanations
"An annoyance. The book is told in first person. At the end, the killer has the protagonist at knife/gun point and is planning to kill her/him, but goes into three of four pages describing how he/she executed the crime -- giving the protagonist just enough time to reach the paperweight with which to bash the criminal over the head.  (Also)...The protagonist receives a phone call from someone who says that he/she has an important clue but can't divulge it over the phone, so the protagonist must come over to her/his place AT ONCE.  When he/she arrives -- SURPRISE! -- the caller has been killed."--Mary Devine, from the DorothyL mystery readers/writers group

The discarded weapon
"I hate it when the protagonist throws away a weapon (usually a gun) and says, "EW!," generally carelessly leaving it where the perp (even if dying) will grab it and shoot the protagonist & kill a beloved secondary character who in a better novel or movie would have gone on to be an enjoyable secondary character."  Brenda from the DorothyL mystery readers/writers group

Confusion masquerading as complexity
"One thing that bugs me is when the author makes the set-up super complex, just to hide the fact that it doesn't make sense. I think this happens a lot in spy thriller/mystery movies -- often I have this moment where I realize that the reason I don't understand everything is not because I failed to follow the story correctly; it's because it really makes no sense." Hannah Sternberg is the author of the young adult novel, Queens of All the Earth

The day job with lots of time for sleuthing
"Amateur sleuths who have a job, or even run a business, but seem able to take unlimited unscheduled time off to sleuth." Carola Dunn is the author of the Daisy Dalrymple mysteries
 
The dead...phone
"Cell phones that go conveniently dead just as the bad guy is zooming in on the protagonist. Darn those cell phones, anyway. They make it a lot harder to get the sleuth out of the shop to investigate, and to get her into trouble she has to work her own way out of." -- Leslie Budewitz is an award-winning mystery author and a lawyer who blogs regularly about how to write accurately about criminal law and courtroom procedures at the Law and Fiction blog.

Pets and children who fade away
"Characters who have pets that are only seen for a comedic moment but never mentioned again, even when the character is home." Pat Brown is the author of a series of L.A.-based mysteries.

The unmistakable and villainous car
"My most irksome peeves involve cars. I lose all suspension of disbelief when our hero is on the run in an unmistakable car, the special-order British Morgan sport car in the case I'm thinking of, and doesn't think to DUMP THE CAR until it's too late. Also, I hate cases of The Sinister Car, where the glimpses of a certain make or model of vehicle provide the only tension for great lengths of narrative. But, most of all, I hate when women in danger carrying guns just FREEZE and can't use it before the villain disarms them. Please. I'm not buying mothers needing assault rifles to take down gangs of terrorists storming their housefuls of cowering children, but one woman and one gun can do a lot of self-defense if necessary." Carole Nelson Douglas has been published in several genres, including suspense.

Oh, baby..."My most hated (peeve) is when the female protag suddenly zeroes in on the magnificent pecs straining the cop or detective's shirt. OMG! You were just mugged or cheated, honey--this is not kissy time!" Star Lawrence is a member of DorothyL, a mystery readers/writers group


The cliched detective
"I personally am sick of the alcoholic, depressed detective. Yes, characters should be flawed, but I'm tired of this cliche. I also dislike the clever ending that is unbelievable but chosen because the author wants to come up with something that no one will guess. I have a couple of books in mind with that flaw." Susan Oleksiw is a member of DorothyL, a mystery readers/writers group

The cliched pantry...

"Add me to the list of those who are annoyed at protagonists who have refrigerators with moldy cheese and pantry shelves with crackers that have no snap left and--maybe--coffee. OR their cousins who eat junk food all day and gain nothing." -- Radine Trees Nehring, is a mystery author, and a 2011 Inductee: Arkansas Writers' Hall of Fame

So much to do...except solve the mystery
"One of my pet peeves is 'the stall'-- when a character gets a promising clue but has to delay following up or else the mystery will be solved too soon. I know this happens in real life because I put off doing things I ought, but in a mystery I find it annoying. It usually goes something like this: sleuth is given phone number for pawn shop that deals in stolen
 goods, but can't call because she has a yoga class in fifteen minutes. Then after yoga class, she gets asked to go for ice cream by cute cop and by then it's too late to call, but she will the first thing next morning except that her dog has a vet appointment and then her cell phone battery dies. Three chapters later she finally calls the guy, who immediately gives her a name or Big Clue and case is solved. Or else she never calls, is in danger, but saved by cute cop who did follow up on the lead. On the other hand, there are authors who do 'the stall' so well that I only realize there was a stall in retrospect. I really admire them." Jeanne of the Bristol Public Library

The bridge to nowhere

"I read a lot of historicals, and it really irritates me when I come across something that I know is an anachronism or distortion of fact that isn't otherwise explained in an Author's Note. Example: going under the Veranzanno Narrows Bridge in 1936, when I know it wasn't built until the 1960s. Something like that destroys the entire 'suspension of disbelief,' and takes me right out of the story." -- Roberta Rogow (who has "fudged" a date or two, but nothing quite so horrendous as that!) is the author of several mysteries

Hacking away
"The super hacker buddy (mentioned in previous Pet Peeves post) was going to be mine, as well. And it's not just cops; it's P.I.s and reporters, etc. They all know someone who'll be able to hack into something and get them the exact piece of information they need. Happens on TV, too, though there it's usually just easily found computer information instead of hacking. Everything is found with a few clicks of the keys." Jane Joregenson is a member of the DorothyL mystery readers/writers group

But what about the mouse?
"Jane's peeve reminded me of one of mine that I see on television shows a lot -- when the crime-solving computer whiz starts clicking away at the keyboard to bring up pages of info. Usually those kinds of searches don't involve keystrokes as much as mouse clicks. Nobody uses the mouse. They type away as if they were Googling on an old Remington." Libby Sternberg is editor-in-chief of Istoria Books and an Edgar-nominated author

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Istoria Books's "Mysterious Monday" program features posts about mystery writing, reading, bookselling and more by writers from beyond the Istoria stable. Stop back on Mondays for insightful posts on the mystery genre. Check out Istoria Books's mystery offerings here.


Mysterious Monday posts from the past:

• The original pet peeves post
• Carola Dunn writes about her experiences with a mysterious bookstore display: Downton Abbey, Barnes & Noble, and Carola Dunn
• JennyMilchman writes about "Putting the MIST in mystery: obscuring facts"

Coming up: Authors Gary Alexander and Joyce Yarrow talk about favorite characters and favorite character types in mystery, and book blogger and reviewer Marlyn Beebe shares her thoughts on what she likes in mysteries
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MYSTERIOUS MONDAY: Pet Peeves in Mysteries

by Libby Sternberg

Years ago, I read a mystery with all the elements for a super satisfying tale: exotic locale and time period, great historic detail, multi-layered characterizations and complex plot. But the resolution involved a culprit who turned out to be the equivalent of a supernumerary, a walk-on role, someone who didn't even have a name or presence in the book, a real "face in the crowd." Grrrr....I thought. Cheap trick! Unfair! It's one of my mystery pet peeves--making the culprit someone the reader couldn't possibly guess.

I asked a bunch of mystery readers and writers what really irritates them when reading/watching mysteries, and below is a round-up of their answers. Enjoy their analyses and then share your own peeves.


The TSTL (too stupid to live) heroine:
"One of mine is the kind of mystery--you can usually tell after the first few pages--where you know the heroine is going to do something stupid and get herself into a sticky situation in the next to last chapter." Carola Dunn, author of the Daisy Dalrymple mysteries

"My pet peeve is when the heroine goes down to the basement in her nighdress when a storm has knocked out the electricity and the phone, knowing that there is a serial killer loose in the neighborhood! I try not to let my heroines be too dumb, although occasionally they are!"  Rhys Bowen is a bestselling mystery novelist and an Agatha- and Anthony-award winner.

The TSTL (too skinny to live) heroine:
When the female detective (police or amateur) eats like a horse but she's skinny because she has such a white-hot metabolism And she eats lots of junk, too. Or she forgets to eat. When a woman (it's always a woman), real or fictional, says 'Oh, I forgot to eat,' I want to hurt her. Bad." Siobhan Kelly is the author of Through a Shot Glass Darkly: A Nebraska Mystery.

The tortured protag and the guest villain
"For me, it's the LEO (law enforcement officer) with 'demons' whether it's alcoholism or a murdered loved one. It was the one thing I didn't like about Castle. Becket's dead mother drove too many of the episodes and the conclusion really made me question watching the show anymore. But the alcoholic cop is beyond cliche. In any serial TV show, you can always tell who the villain is -- the well known guest star."  Pat Brown is the author of series of L.A.-based mysteries


Coinkydinks, miraculous recoveries, and bad grammar
"Whopping coincidence to solve the crime. Coincidence does happen in real life. Okay, but let's not use it to solve the mystery. Unrealistic physical action such as the PI is seriously  beat up and then within hours or minutes is back to full function. Bad grammar revealing the writer/editor merely used a computer program to check spelling and sentence construction. Over-use of current slang." Carl Brookins is the author of several mystery series.

Speaking of coincidence...
"When the detective protagonist, especially when he or she is a private investigator, happens to be in exactly the right place at the right time and thus is suddenly embroiled in a case instead of being sought and hired by a client. It happened to Mike Hammer in most of his cases, and has happened to, among other luminaries, Philip Marlowe (the opening of Farewell, My Lovely) and Lew Archer (Find a Victim)." Barry Ergang is a Derringer winner for best short flash fiction and a former mystery magazine editor.  

Cast of thousands
"Too many characters mentioned briefly and sometimes randomly.... I just wish the author would add a character key. Good example of an excellent character key is in St. Zita Society by Ruth Rendell (2012). She uses the inside cover to show the characters in her book. This made reading the book a true pleasure. If I get the notion early on that there will be many characters, I create a running list--but it is a pain, especially if I catch on too far into the book. I am sure I am not the only one with this complaint or problem remembering names. I also agree 100% with you about the person briefly mentioned being the culprit!" Janis Rothermel

Speaking of culprits arriving late...
"My pet peeve is when the detective pulls the killer out of thin air. All of a sudden the killer shows up in the last chapter and he's the guilty party. They have been doing this a lot on TV lately because there are so many commercials that there is not enough time left to create sufficient clues for a good story." Richard Brawer is the author of numerous books, including the Silk Legacy series.

Too much rock 'em sock 'em
"I get sick of knowing that the hero/heroine has to get beaten up before the book can end. I don't really enjoy that part any more than I do violence in movies. I understand that the author wants to create suspense, etc., but wouldn't it be nice if they had sufficient talent to do it some other way?" Leslie S. Lebl

Experts who know experts...

"We read and scoffed at a series where the protagonist just happened to have not only all of the necessary skills, but just happened to know an expert who could help." Judi Maxwell

"Wait and I'll reveal all...."
"I hate it when the characters say, 'I can't tell you until I ---' and then, of course, they go off on their own and bad stuff happens. I like to be in the character's head, and if the author can't figure out a way to stick to the character's POV while withholding information, that irritates me.  And, in reference to your pet peeve -- Lee Lofland reviews Castle for police procedure every week on his blog, and he says he can always guess the killer because it's the character they bring in early, ask a few questions, and dismiss." Terry Odell is the author of romance, romantic suspense and mystery

The killer next door
"The heroine's new boyfriend turns out to be the one killing people (and trying to kill her). Some well-known writers have committed this sin. Please. How lazy can you get?? I also hate thrillers in which one of the cops or FBI agents chasing a serial killer turns out to be the serial killer. Again, some well-known writers have done this. And again, it's just plain lazy and unimaginative." Sandra Parshall is author of the Rachel Goddard mysteries

 "One of my biggest pet peeves is the twisted, sick cop as killer. I'm sure there are twisted, sick cops out there who have killed.... I don't think the percentage is greater within law enforcement, but too many novels would have you believe otherwise. My other huge pet peeve is the stupid law enforcement professional, like the FBI agents who don't check the house next door to their safe house because it's a vacation home and not occupied off-season. Well, guess where the serial killer was hiding all along?" Lois Winston is the author of The Anastasia Pollack Crafting Mysteries

The recapitulation sermon
"One thing that drives me nuts...We get to the solution of the mystery, the bad guy is caught (or dead), and then we get 10-15 pages of the hero explaining how he/she figured it all out. What I say is that the reader, at the end, should be able to get that without a huge amount of recapitulation..." Don Coffin 

The evil twin
"Call it bad luck or whatever, but two recent reads from  two favorite British authors (who shall be nameless) where in each story a villain at the end was a twin of the suspect! I couldn't believe the coincidence. I think that having one villain turning out to be a twin is asking a lot of patience from a reader, but one after the other put me off both writers for a while!" Kit Sloane, author of The Margot & Max series.

Super cyber buddies
"The super hacker cop buddy bugs me. When a PI or cop is at a dead end in the investigation, or there's critical but unobtainable information out there, they go to their super hacker buddy who can break into anything. Sure enough, he gets the key data. It's a crutch. In pre-computer days it was informants lurking everywhere.  'Word on the street is....' The computer-related pet peeve that's really annoying, though, is guessing a person's password in one or two attempts."  Michael Allan Mallory (along with Marilyn Victor) is the author of the Snake Jones Zoo mysteries

The perp prologue, the closeted killer
"I have two (pet peeves). The first is the prologue told from the unnamed adversary, be it a serial killer or lunatic, who reveals a small amount of the plot as he/she plans to make the first move. The second is the gay killer who kills to stay in the closet.. Oy, what a tired old chestnut that is...." Jeffrey Marks is the author of both fiction and nonfiction. He is working on a biography of Ellery Queen

What's in a name?
"This one was in a mystery but doesn't involve the mystery itself. The writing otherwise was fairly well done, but in conversations, the characters mentioned each other by first name in nearly every sentence. It was quite distracting and totally unnecessary. It was obvious from the conversation who was speaking, and people just don't address each other that way." Chester Campbell writes a series of post-Cold War political thrillers.

Yes, what is in a name? 
Pet peeves:
--giving someone who turns out to be bad an angelic name to divert suspicion from that character.
--giving someone who turns out to be the killer a name that's clearly a pseudonym . Michael Connelly did that and I stopped reading him.
--throwing in a gratuitous sex scene that doesn't advance the story or deepen insight into the characters . Lev Raphael is the author of mystery and historical novels

Gotta .... confess!
"My pet peeve is when the detective provokes a confession on the slimmest of evidence. I find it hard to believe that a clever murderer who knows that there is not sufficient physical evidence to charge him would confess when presented with what amounts to a 'guess' on the part of the detective. " Mary Ann Myer

That suspect is too obvious to talk to
"One of mine (pet peeves) is when the investigation is prolonged because no one questioned the right, very obvious person. (This happened) in a well-reviewed series, smart and witty, but the book was about a girl from a strict, religious family who disappeared. If such a person had a near-in-age sister, who would you talk to first? And keep talking to. Yes, me, too. (I had two daughters) I never read another book by the author." Triss Stein is the author of Brooklyn Bones, an Erica Donato mystery

Dreams, loose ends, random action
1. An unexpected letter or phone call that arrives or turns up at the end and reveals a vital clue.
2. A dream that reveals that vital clue. (Note: I have no problem with dreams revealing the detective's mind at work while asleep, but an out-of-nowhere dream revelation not based on facts already presented will make me close the book.)
3. No logic or thought to lay a foundation for action so the sleuth's moves appear random and we readers wonder why he or she is doing something.
4. Too many loose ends or confusion at the end. Carolyn J. Rose, author (Who has been guilty of doing all of this in early works and may do it again because I'm not getting any younger)

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Libby Sternberg is editor-in-chief of Istoria Books. She is also an Edgar-nominated novelist.

Istoria Books's "Mysterious Monday" program features posts about mystery writing, reading, bookselling and more by writers from beyond the Istoria stable. Stop back on Mondays for insightful posts on the mystery genre. Check out Istoria Books's mystery offerings here.


Mysterious Monday posts from the past:

• Carola Dunn writes about her experiences with a mysterious bookstore display: Downton Abbey, Barnes & Noble, and Carola Dunn
• Jenny Milchman writes about "Putting the MIST in mystery: obscuring facts"

Coming up: Authors Gary Alexander and Joyce Yarrow talk about favorite characters and favorite character types in mystery.

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MYSTERIOUS MONDAY: Downton Abbey, Barnes & Noble, and Carola Dunn

by Carola Dunn

A few weeks ago, my editor told me Barnes and Noble had picked my 19th Daisy Dalrymple mystery, Anthem for Doomed Youth, to be part of a nationwide promotion for Downton Abbey. Yes, I was excited!

The third season of the popular series is set in England between the wars--WWI and WWII, that is. Besides books about the period, B&N were looking for novels set at that time. They planned to have 5 or so copies of each chosen book on display near the checkout counter, in every store in the US. St. Martin's was to do a special reprint of the paperback edition for them.

My editor said the four-week promotion was to begin on January 8th. So on the day, I trotted along to the local store. I must have circled the store 3 times before I decided I just wasn't going to find the display. All the booksellers were busy, so I came home disappointed and tried to call them. Impossible to speak to a Real Person, or to leave a message, or even to stay on hold. At last, later that evening I got through.

The person I spoke to had never heard of a Downton Abbey promotion. He looked it up on his computer, and couldn't find anything that mentioned it. :-( 

I emailed my editor. I also asked my Facebook friends to pop into the nearest B&N if they happened to be passing and see what they could see. My editor contacted Macmillan's "B&N person," who promised to get onto it.

The responses I had from FB friends were not encouraging:

"There is a Downton Abbey display here in Naples, FL, but no Anthem for Doomed Youth."

"Checked the store in Fort Gratiot, MI. No Downton display but Anthem is on display in the new Mystery section."

"This was unfortunately the case last night at the W. 82nd location in Manhattan as well. I had called ahead and put Anthem on hold, but before I retrieved it, I sought out the Downton display to check out what else they had out. I found it on the endcap of the aisle that contained Mystery. So when I didn't see Anthem on display, I found it only a few feet away. I feigned ignorance tho just so I could ask an employee to find it for me and then mention I thought it was part of the Downton promo. I doubt it did any good, but I did want to mention it to them. Still glad to have a brand new copy of Anthem, which I hadn't read yet, but it was disappointing."

"I found the Downton Abbey display at the Ithaca Barnes & Noble - it was about 7 books on an endcap (no Anthem!). I caught a fellow and asked where the Anthem books were. He pulled out a paper with the particulars about the display, and it didn't include yours. He checked the computer and they had 5 new Anthems, it said they were supposed to be in a "Cash Wrap" (?) "up front". We found them stacked on a desk; so I don't know where they are going to end up. But I did impress upon him that all your 'Facebook friends' would be looking for the Anthems." 

And have to laugh at this one, I guess: "Went to B&N in Woodland Hills yesterday and they were gone. Had been there just before Christmas. The sign said they closed 12/31/12."

I forwarded all these and more to my editor, at his request. Whether they helped or not I don't know, but I'm very grateful to all those who took the time to check. Three cheers for Facebook friends!

On Sunday, I returned to the local (Eugene) store. There was Anthem, right by the cash registers, with a selection of other books set in the time period! I asked if they'd like me to sign them, which they did, and even dug out some of my other titles for me to sign.

When I got home and turned on the computer, there was an email from my editor--he had found the same in his local B&N.

I'm not sure what the moral of this story is. Be patient and they'll get around to it? Or persistence pays--keep bugging till they act?

One way or another, I'm happy to announce that if you go into a Barnes and Noble store in the next few weeks, you may--or may not--find a Downton Abbey promotion that includes Anthem for Doomed Youth!

Read about the book here: 
http://caroladunn.weebly.com/1/category/anthem%20for%20doomed%20youth/1.html
  (scroll down a bit)

Or read an excerpt here:
http://historicalfictionexcerpts.blogspot.com/2013/01/anthem-for-doomed-youth-ii.html 

It's also available as an ebook. 
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Istoria Books's "Mysterious Monday" program features posts about mystery writing, reading, bookselling and more by writers from beyond the Istoria stable.  Stop back on Mondays for insightful posts on the mystery genre. 

This post, by Carola Dunn, first appeared at the Murderous Musings blog on January 16, 2013.

Mysterious Monday posts from the past:
Jenny Milchman writes about "Putting the MIST in mystery: obscuring facts"

Coming up: Authors Gary Alexander and Joyce Yarrow talk about favorite characters and favorite character types in mystery.

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